"In This Season, I am speaking..." by Beauty Fitts, Guest Blogger

Have you ever found yourself wondering what’s next? What’s the next chapter going to look like or if you’re coming or going. I often have found myself operating through what we call the “motions,” or transitioning through seasons. I’ve never really found myself throughout my life taking the time to analyze or self reflect on what’s currently happening. I was literally just focusing on how to make it through the day, week or month.

I remember when I started therapy and my first session my therapist broke me down y’all! She mentioned all my life I was in fight mode, living in chaos and fighting everything that came my way. I was so oblivious to the fact that this is how I was operating. See, for me I was just simply “surviving,” my therapist referred to this long season in my life as “looking for a place to rest my head” (I know intense right?).

Throughout my life I really had developed a trauma response of always having to defend myself, or be on edge because I felt like it was just me navigating through my life without support or a safe space. It wasn’t until I sat and unpacked ALL the years of my life that caused me to feel like that and let’s just say Wooh. I was living my life in pure chaos and it started to really trickle down to my house and my kids. I literally was just coming and going y’all and my kids were just passengers on the ride. I didn’t want that for them. Having kids and being aware that ultimately your childhood will affect their childhood in some way, shape or form, is a tough pill to swallow. For me that was all the reason for me to go to therapy. Through my months of therapy, I found myself unpacking and letting go of the chaos that I was so consumed in and when I say it was like a breath of fresh air! Yes!

I started to look around and my appetite was slowly changing for things that I wanted in my life, conversations I wanted to have or how I even responded to conversations, gossip or even my response to my kid (gentle parenting is hard y’all)!

What this started to look like for me was peace!

I started to become aware of the “seasons” and the space I was operating in and it was peaceful. PEACE, a word that for me now, has become my everyday. I have been operating in peace, finding myself not wanting to be consumed with things that don’t bring me peace or anything that would harm or take it away. Let’s face it, when you have worked so hard for something you will try your best to protect it.

In this season of my life I am constantly choosing my peace and doing that has reshaped every aspect of my life. My circles have become smaller, my conversation has changed and most importantly God has positioned me in a space to where I can’t be moved and it’s one of most calming feelings.

Beauty is the founder and CEO of "BeaFitt" an innovative wellness organization created to motivate and inspire women to show up in all spaces as themselves. Pushing women to feel comfortable with being authentic and true to who they are. She currently resides in Waterloo, Iowa with her 2 beautiful children. Visit her at www. beafitts.com.